Misery Business
by Mii-Chan 24
Summary: Post Final Warning. Just a little Max rant to the tune of Paramore's 'Misery Business'. Damn teenage mutant bird kid hormones.


**Misery Business**

**By Amaya 24**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. If I did, **_**The Final Warning**_** wouldn't have been so short!! Oh, and I don't own Paramore either. **

**Oh, if you haven't realized, this is post Final Warning. Just a little jealous Max ranting to the tune of Paramore's 'Misery Business'.**

The Flock was taking a bit off a break from saving the world; after we left that school the government oh so kindly built for us, the Voice (The new one) sent us on a goose chase across the Continental U.S.

Now, we were taking a breather near the Rockies, chilling in one of the many caves the place had to offer.

"Geez," Iggy grumbled quietly in the corner, tinkering with... something. It looked like a robot had thrown up near him.

"What's up, Igs?" I asked, digging through Nudge's backpack for our iPod. Iggy sighed.

"Well. We're famous. We're everywhere out there, but we're still in _here_--" He motioned at the cave "-- eating desert rat _au bien cuit_ and hanging out with hawks. We should be stuffing ourselves in ritzy hotels." He complained bitterly. I chuckled.

"Iggy, remember the exploding pizza? Doubt whoever sent us that'll hesitate in sending us another one." I pointed out, unwinding the headphones from the (ugh) pink iPod. Angel picked it out, of course.

I sighed, bored, scrolling down the songs. 'Misery Business' caught my eye, and I chose it, leaning back against the wall to listen. Let's see what Fang's been listening to.

Thinking about Fang got me thinking about us. And thinking about us got me thinking about how it started. Which got me thinking about the Red-Haired Wonder. Thinking about her got me thinking about Fang's most recent conquest, the lovely Miss Brigid Dwyer. I growled, feeling my stomach boil.

The song started softly, fuzzy, like coming from an old radio. Then it cleared up, blasting loud enough to make me wince. I lowered the volume, concentrating on the lyrics.

_I'm in the business of misery;_

_Let's take it from the top._

'Business of misery' indeed; why am I such a masochist? Do I _enjoy_ torturing myself with images of... THEM? I guess I must. This song's reminding me way too much of them.

_She's got a body like an hourglass_

_It's ticking like a clock!_

Well, the Red Haired Wonder wasn't so much 'hourglass' as... beach ball. I'm serious -- She looked like she was pregnant. Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if she was.

And Miss 'Frigid' Brigid... well. A broken hourglass. With the top missing. She was completely and utterly flat on top. I glared at the screen. Songs seem to hate me for some reason.

_It's a matter of time before we all run out._

_When I thought he was mine, she caught him by the mouth --_

Stupid line immediately got me thinking of my first encounter with the Red-Haired Wonder, when I saw them sucking each other's tonsils out with their tongues.

Angel looked at me, worried, but I waved her away; I was going to wallow in my misery, dang it!

I'm starting to wonder how much it would cost me to make a Red Haired Wonder voodoo doll?

_I waited eight long months; she finally set him free_

_I told him I couldn't lie -- he was the only one for me._

Well, I haven't said anything, so I guess this doesn't apply to me? _He's_ the one that keeps on wanting to 'talk'.

_Two weeks and we'd caught on fire_

_She's got it out for me but I wear the biggest smile!_

No emotions; show no emotions, just like Fang -- just like at the school. Plaster on the fakest smile you can, but hey, you're still smiling!

_Whoa! I never meant to brag._

_But I got him where I want him now!_

_Mainly away from you leeches, _I seethed, wanting to throw the iPod across the room but stopping myself. I'm still trying to outgrow that, you know.

_Whoa! It was never my intention to brag_

_To steal it all away from you now_

_Steal it away? That's such an ugly sentence. More like, protecting him from you. Yep_. I chuckled at my rationalization, then blinked as Angel projected an alarmed look into my head.

_Max? Are you okay?_ Angel thought, getting ready to call Fang or Iggy over. I nodded, attempting a smile and failing.

_I'm fine, sweetie. Just slowly going insane_. I added that last part for my benefit. Angel frowned, scooting closer to me, but I shook my head.

_I'm kidding, Angel. I'm fine._ I told her, turning back to the song.

_But God does it feel so good_

_'cause I got him where I want him now!_

_And if you could then you know you would_

_'cause God it just feels so..._

_It just feels so good._

_Second chances _

_They don't ever matter people never change_

That's right; people NEVER change! Why should I think that 'he' want to talk all of a sudden, for no reason? He's plotting something. I just don't know what...

_What's a whore? You're nothing more_

_I'm sorry that'll never change_

I laughed at that one, realizing that that line fit Frigid Brigid and the Red Haired Wonder to a T. Iggy raised an eyebrow, questioning my sanity, but since I didn't start cackling maniacally, he let me be.

_And about forgiveness _

_We're both supposed to have exchanged_

_I'm sorry hunny but I passed it up now look this way_

I rolled my eyes. I wouldn't forgive them. Or forget, for that matter.

_There's a million other girls who do it just like you_

_Looking as innocent as possible to get to who _

_They want and what_

_They like it's 'easy if you do it right' _

_Well I refuse, I refuse I REFUSE!_

A million other girls waiting in the sidelines to jump at him when they found a chance -- yippie!

For some reason, I found myself fighting with, well, _myself_. One side was arguing violently that _I_ was the one who launched myself away from him, not once, but TWO times. That side was asking why I was getting so worked up over a stupid song.

The other side was hissing and spitting at anyone stupid enough to get near. It wasn't even fighting; it was like my animal and human side were in a wrestling match, and my clear, rational side was getting its butt royally kicked.

_Whoa! I never meant to brag._

_But I got him where I want him now!_

_Whoa! It was never my intention to brag_

_To steal it all away --_

I couldn't take it any more. I ripped the headphones off, stabbed the 'off' button violently and shoved the whole thing into Nudge's bag again, huffing angrily.

Now Angel, Nudge and Gazzy were staring at me like I had a couple of screws missing, and Iggy was considering it. Fang was too busy blogging to notice, but I did catch him shoot me a questioning look. I ignored them all and walked towards the cave, launching myself out into the air.

Damn teenage bird-kid hormones.

**I get it, it's crap, but frankly, it's late, I'm sleepy and I was listening to this song. To the lyrics, more importantly, and I started thinking... yeah. Review, even if it's just to tell me that I shouldn't be allowed to be on computers.**


End file.
